It was after church services a few weeks ago and I found myself holding a precious little treasure in my arms. This treasure was about 4 months old and he owned a pair of blue eyes that I’m sure could steal anyone’s heart. In my conversation with one of the moms, I mentioned just how much I desired to be a mother of my own precious little treasures one day.
She began to reply, and I was sure she was going to give me the “contentment speech.” You know, “be happy and serve God where He has placed you and in His time He will bring along ‘Mr. Right’.” Thing is, I am truly happy with my life; I feel full. I only want the next phase when God says it’s time. Overall, I am content. But she surprised me–she didn’t discredit that desire, instead she encouraged me. She told me that those were God given desires and she truly believed He would fulfill them. It was neat to hear that. It was so different for that desire to be affirmed.
Like any girl, I’ve carried big dreams about my knight in shining armor. I’ve known some girls to write very extensive lists on what they want their husbands to be. Oh sure, it’d be nice if he could sing and play instruments well, if he were a good writer, spoke several languages, was romantic, and was really athletic–the list could go on and on. But what my heart has craved and my prayers have echoed is that he would be a passionate lover of God; that he would have a dynamic relationship with the Lord.
For if a man loves God–truly loves and follows after Him and has a humble and teachable spirit, then everything else will fall into place. No, he won’t be perfect, he will fail just as much as I do. We won’t be perfect, but we will grow and learn together. That’s part of the beauty of it.
Occasionally I put myself in the place of the kind of man I would like to marry and make a list of the kind of woman he would want to marry and then I work on those things. Do you desire a man of prayer? Become a woman of prayer. Do you desire a man that meditates on God’s Word? Start meditating! What about a man that is involved in ministry? Become a woman that serves and ministers to those around her. (I’m writing as a girl to girls, but it works the same way reversed).
We can daydream, we can wish about our Knight in Shining Armor. But would we be the kind of woman he is looking for?
And this doesn’t only apply to our “spiritual side.” Wouldn’t the man of your dreams appreciate an organized house and a well-cooked meal?
It really boils down to this: become the kind of person you’d like to marry.
No, we won’t be perfect–we’ll fail. I can promise you that. But this season of singleness is so precious. We are given such a precious gift from God. We have time to prepare, time to develop our walk with the Lord, time to reach out to others… If you’d like somewhere to get started, Proverbs 31:10-31 has some great pointers. *smile
Verses 10-12 says:
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
Will we do our husbands good all the days of our lives? Even before we know his name? Are we preparing for him, being faithful to him, and building a foundation of trust now?
That’s where I’m at right now. That’s a little of what I’ve been learning this year–to become the woman my Knight would be seeking for. Time is so short, and I’ve already wasted so much of it. And truly, if we are living fully for Jesus now, obeying Him, seeking His face, loving Him and allowing Him to change us, then we will become the person our spouse needs. As we focus on Christ and lose ourselves in Him, I believe everything else will fall into place.
Today I purpose to do my husband good as I follow after Christ.
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uncommon grace 
Wow! What a blessing to hear! I’ve been having the same struggle… although I’m completly content at home, I do want to become a wife and mother! Very encouraging words! Thanks!
I really appreciate reading this post… From a young man’s prospective, it is encouraging to see that there are still godly women out in the world who desire to love Christ more than their future spouse and desire that their spouse do the same. It is good to hear that there are young women out there that want to honor their future spouse. This keeps me encouraged as I live out my daily life, waiting for God to place a woman in my life, I know that I can look out for a godly young woman who follows the virtues stated in Proverbs 31!!!
Thanks much!
No, thank you, Jakob. What you said encouraged me so much. It is so powerful to have that kind of affirmation.
that’s some good stuff right there, Grace! Randomly stumbled across your blog this eve when I saw your comment on Chels’s blog and wondered if it was the Grace I was thinking of.:) Turns out, it was. Anyways…..just wanted to let you know it was a pleasure and blessing to peruse your blog a little. You are a very talented writer, but most of all, I am blessed by your deep longing for more of Jesus- it is SO evident through your writing! Keep it up, girlfriend!
blessings,
Allison B